Get on the Same Page and Learn the Magic of Rapport

You know what it's like when you meet someone who you 'click' with? You feel at ease, relaxed and almost immediately you relate to them? You understand 'where they are coming from', and you are 'on the same page'.

Sometimes this feeling is spontaneous,it seems to just happen. I bet you also can think of times when you have had the opposite feeling? There may be people in your life that you really cannot seem to relate to in any way, shape or form. This feeling or lack of it, is called rapport.

How does rapport work?

You think using your senses. You may not realise it but when you think about something you are either seeing a picture, hearing a sound or feeling a feeling, depending your 'sensory preference, ie which of your senses you use the most.

Try it and see...Think about a cute fluffy little dog... Did you see a dog? Did you hear it bark? or did you get certain feeling about the dog?

You have 3 dominant senses, Visual (see), Auditory (hear)and Kinesthetic (feel). The other senses olfactory (smell) and gustatory(taste) are not usually sensory preferences.

In the general population it is estimated that 45% are visual, 15% auditory 40% kinesthetic.

How do you know which is your sensory preference?

One way to tell is to listen to the words you naturally use to describe your experience, ie, visual people tend to use 'visual words, ie 'I see what you mean' 'Its very clear to me'.

Someone with an auditory preference will use words like, 'I can hear that! or I'll give you a tinkle.... '

Kinesthetic people will use action or feeling words like 'I need to get a grip on this' or 'Let's touch base soon'.

By learning to integrate visual words when talking to a visual person and auditory words to someone who has an auditory preference you will deepen the communication with that person and so create rapport with them.

This is just one way that you can consciously create rapport with someone, which can be very important if you want to be able to communicate more effectively with that person.

So, by understanding that people think using their senses, it will allow you to 'get on the same page' as others when you are communicating with them, and so get into rapport with them.

Rapport is the basis of trust, and when you trust someone, you are more likely to be influenced by what they say and do. You feel you are 'like' the other person.

Rapport is often an unconscious thing where you 'feel' at ease with the other person, you relax and you feel in harmony with them.

Other ways to consciously build rapport can be for example, subtly matching body posture, language, voice tone, standard of dress. Imagine if you turned up to a professional business meeting in jeans and t shirt, I bet you would feel 'out of rapport' instantly!

Once you are in rapport with the other person you are more likely to 'clearly see their point of view,' and 'hear where they are coming from' and 'get in touch them!'

Julie Rowlands is a Associate Certified Coach with International Coach Federation, and certified NLP Practitioner.

Julie is the creator of 'From Survive to Thrive with an Empty Nest.' The online coaching programme designed specifically to help you redesign your life and rediscover 'you', after your kids have flown the nest!

Visit http://www.fastforwardcoach.com/OnlineCoaching and get a No Obligation- 7 day Free Trial when you sign up for the programme.

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